Does ANYONE Actually Like The Taste of Starbucks?

“I just LOVE the taste of their coffee.”

If anyone has said this about Starbucks coffee, they are LYING through their yellow teeth. I have gone to Starbucks countless times, thanks to holiday gift cards, or pure convenience. After all, if you live or work in New York City, you could take a stroll and probably count a Starbucks every 30 seconds. (Why can’t it be Dunkin Donuts everywhere!) But the reason why I go is never, EVER because I say, “I just LOVE the taste of their coffee.”

The only way Starbucks coffee ever tastes good is if I double the amount of sugar and half and half I normally put in. Mix a little chocolate and cinnamon and, well, anything else they offer at that counter just to give the coffee some decent flavor, and then—and only then—will I admit the coffee tastes good. (Until I get to the bottom where the taste of the remaining condiments will make you gag.)

Now I went to business school in college. I know what kind of business plan Starbucks is operating with, and it is pure genius. Sell ambiance. Sell image. But I’m sorry. For such an upscale coffee shop, you’d at least hope that the coffee you sell isn’t as bitter as people like me who wished they came up with the concept first. When the street cart coffee tastes better than what the green-aproned Corporate America servants hand you, then what does that tell us about our society?

Holding a Starbucks cup is just like wearing a Prada bag or Rolex watch. It’s making the choice of using an iPod over a generic MP3 player. I bet you won’t see a paparazzi shot of Mary-Kate Olsen standing on the corner ordering a caramel macchiato from a street cart.

I pride myself in having good taste—be it in men, clothes, restaurants or movies. But if there’s one thing I admit I don’t have good taste in, its coffee. Because no matter how badly I dislike the taste, I’m still a Starbucks customer. That’s because I, like everyone else, is fooled by the cool atmosphere and the classy cups, and in turn, must drink the crappy coffee.


DISCLAIMER: Brooke would like to apologize on behalf of all the Starbucks drinkers who actually do like the taste of their coffee. But asks you one question: Have you even TRIED Dunkin Donuts coffee?