You Wanna Rock!? See Rock of Ages on Broadway!

Beer and Broadway.

No, its not an oxymoron, but the description of Rock of Ages -- one of the most unique Broadway experiences I've had. Part Broadway show, part rock concert, and as a winner of front row lottery tickets for $26.50, it was ALL worth it!

Rock of Ages, starring former American Idol winner, Constantine Maroulis, who actually did a fantastic job, portrays a barback in the 80s hoping to make it big as a rocker. He falls for a smal-town girl, living in a lonely world (yes, "Don't Stop Believing" is one of the many 80s songs you'll be rocking out to!)


But unlike some Broadway shows, Rock of Ages has a plot, and a lot of great laughs. My particular favorite is when Lonny points out to Drew (Maroulis) that he's actually currently living his life in a Broadway show. The start of every song played will have you looking at the person next to you and say, "Yesssss, great song!!!" And yes, you'll be saying it with a beer in hand, too.

The best part though, is that most guys will enjoy Rock of Ages too, and the fact that they don't have to check their masculinity at the door for this type of show. Now maybe you won't be as lucky as I was to win front row tickets, but you're bound to enjoy it, "Any Way You Want It," so long as you "Wanna Rock!"

BREAKING NEWS: The Brooke Schneider Show Sets Record!

Yesterday, The Brooke Schneider Show blog saw unprecedented numbers on the site, reaching the highest hits since its creation. There can only be one explanation. Since the previous "Top Three of the Week" post, it looks like the photo of the Gynocologist has been creating a high level of traffic.

All I can say is, like many of you fellows out there---GOD BLESS THE VAGINA!

Top 3 of the Week: Jobs Thankfully People Want To Do

1) Gynocologist/Proctocologist
You know when you were younger, and someone asked you what you wanted to do when you grow up? If you said "I want to work with vaginas or penises," well, then you were destined to be a Gynocologist or Proctocologist (or a Pimp). Again, another field that us women are thankful someone wants to do, with the hope that that someone is a good-hearted woman and not a creepy (yet obviously educated) man. I can't really speak for the men out there!


2) Bathroom Cleaner:
You all read my Top 3 of the Week on public bathrooms, but one of the most disturbing actions we take is opening up a bathroom stall only to step back in disgust and say, "EWWW! What the hell!" What we sometimes forget to realize is that someone's got to clean that shit up (literally).


3) Accountant:
So let me get this straight. You spend all day entering numbers into an excel sheet and you actually enjoy it? Well thank god you do. Because having to take an accounting class as a Marketing major in college was probably as painful as the thought of waking up each morning knowing that I'd be doing that for a living!

Mets and Yanks Playing Let's Make a Deal?

Mets:
Omar Minaya chose to sit tight a few weeks ago when it was clear the Mets needed help on offense. Well now, the team that was fortunate enough to hang in there in a weak division are now seeing some separation between them and the charging Phillies. With no projected date in sight for a return for Reyes, Beltran and Delgado, Minaya must decide if another bat is worth getting at this point, or if a team we thought would be buyers turns into sellers at the deadline.

Look for the Mets to investigate in an outfielder or 1st baseman, unless Minaya is content after the odd within-the-division deal with the Braves for Jeff Francoeur. If so, then Omar better bring a chair cooler to work because he’s going to be on the hot seat! (oh, snap!)



Yankees:
It’s actually refreshing to see the Yankees have a solid winning record at the midway point of the season, even if they’re still chasing the Red Sox. And it shouldn’t be a surprise, the Yankees roster is filled with (overpaid) talent, but it’s still missing a few pieces. The ongoing debate of Joba moving to the bullpen should end--with Joba in the pen, of course. He might end up there, or he also might find a home in Toronto if GM Brian Cashman pulls the trigger on a deal for stud pitcher, Roy Halladay (who was reportedly involved in a trade proposal with the Mets, that Omar apparently turned down).

It’s hard to imagine the Yankees investing in another $15mil+/year if they trade for Halladay and resign him in the offseason. But if there’s no Halladay celebration, the Yanks will probably acquire their standard middle relievers or look to find a cheaper replacement in the rotation for the disappointing and now injured Chien-Ming Wang, as Cashman is bound to make at least one deal before July 31st.

Rant of the Week: Why Are We OK with Driving with People We Don't Know?

Top 3 of the Week: Things Men Can Learn From Watching The Bachelorette

1) Open Up!
Even if you don’t feel it, sometimes you got to listen to Madonna and “express yourself, hey hey hey heyyyy”! My favorite eligible bachelor on the show, Reid, had a hard time telling Jillian his thoughts and feelings about a potential future. The result? He got booted.
Note to all you men out there: speak up or we’ll kick you to the curb for someone who can tell us what they want!


2) Show You Care!
Yes, even if that means flying your parents out to Hawaii (ok, fine, it won’t work in most cases, but Ed got MAJOR points!). Jillian stressed to Ed how much she would have liked to meet his parents after Ed missed the opportunity when he left for “work-related” reasons. Even though he did return, proving yet again how much he cared for Jillian, it was only after he made the decision that work took precedence.
Guys--if your not willing to put love before work, you’re not going to find love!


3) Do Not Pretend To Be Someone You're Not!
Look what happened to Wes, the idiot (who clearly doesn’t understand the concept of bad publicity), laughed off the fact that he made it all the way to the top 4 with a girlfriend whilst holding a beer in his hand. Wes came on the show with the hopes of promoting his country band, when it was stated the only country that Wes will sell records in is Mexico. Eek.
Boys--do not pretend to be someone you are not. It’s only a matter of time before a girl finds out your true colors!

Let's Admit: There is No Ideal Job!

Does anyone really enjoy their job?

We're always bound to complain about something.

The hours are too long. The hours are non-traditional. The pay isn't enough. You're only doing it for the pay. The location sucks. The commute sucks. The coworkers are terrible. The coworkers are the only thing keeping you there. It's not the field you want to be in. It's not the direction you want to go in. You're not home enough. You're home too much. You hate your boss. You hate your department. You're standing on your feet all day. You're stuck behind a desk all day.


We all complain. And to those who we complain to, well, they don't want to hear it. Because they're damn well sure their position is worse than yours. When you talk about your job, if you get a "your job sounds awesome" response, you often follow it by "well it sounds better than it is."

Can we all just come to the conclusion that 99% of us would like to win the lottery and never work again? The other 1% probably grew up rich and works just to keep busy (I HATE YOU).

If you're lucky enough to truly love your job (mine right now is pretty cool), then you're the envy of many. But let's all just admit there is no IDEAL JOB!

PREMIERE OF: The Rant of the Week!

Top 3 of the Week: Songs I Can't Stop Dancing to This Summer

1) "When Love Takes Over" David Guetta featuring Kelly Rowland


Not only is she a co-host of The Fashion Show on Bravo, but a hit single too!? That was WAY more than I expected when her and former Destiny's Child member, Michelle Williams decided to pursue solo careers without the help of ringleader, Beyonce. This is a song you CANNOT help but tap your feet too, unless you lost your feet in a terrible accident, then..well..I'm sorry I brought it up. At any rate, when this song takes over, I wouldn't stop it if I could! Yeahhhhh!

2) "Hush Hush" PussyCat Dolls

Speaking of Destiny's Child, could the Pussycat Dolls follow in their footsteps with lead singer Nicole Scherzinger prepared to start a solo gig? (That's the latest rumor but Hush Hush--you didn't hear it from me!) If so, I'm glad they got this song in before they left. But I ask this: why is it that both Beyonce and Nicole are not only the best singers, but blessed with the best looks in the bunch too? Not fair. Some of their songs have been corny in the past, ("When I Grow Up" sounds like a Toys-R-US anthem), but this one is pretty awesome.


3) "I Know You Want Me" Pitbull


I don't know if you want me, but what I do know is that I can't stop dancing to this song. I've always said that as long as a song has a good beat, I'll listen to it (yes, that even includes country music). So even though the lyrics go something like " Mami got an ass like a donkey, with a monkey," it still gets me moving my donkey ass on the dance floor!

Bathing Suits vs. Underwear – NO DIFFERENCE!

Bathing Suits vs. Underwear

What is the difference?

I’ll tell you.

The fabric.

That’s about it.










Underwear

Bathing Suit

Can’t tell the difference between the two, can you?

What’s stopping me from roaming around a poolside in granny pants and a bra? It’s no different than wearing a bikini now, is it? You’re seeing the same coverage, now, aren’t you?

Not to say I’m comfortable walking around my house or chilling outside in my underwear, but let’s just remember that in theory, we are looking at the same thing!

Top 3 of the Week: Things I Don't Think is Worth the Money

1) Buying Books
So you find a book you really like to buy at the store, bring it home, read it, and then what? Read it again? Um, not likely. There's a thing called the library, and while I mostly utilize mine for its current CDs and DVDs, if there's a book I want to read, I'm going reach into my wallet for my library card and not my $20 bill!


2) Manicures
I might be one of the few girls who doesn't enjoy this form of pampering. Unless its a french manicure, I don't find the reason to spend money on my nails when I can easily do it myself. Ok, maybe not, easily, as using my non-dominant left hand to paint my right hand is quite the challenge. But if I can't notice the difference between my nails and those who get manicures, I think I'll use my money elsewhere.

3) Downloading iTunes Music
I have never bought a single song off iTunes, since the majority of music I want to buy are probably the same that are played on the radio. So hmm, just turn on the radio, or buy it for my iPod? OK, fine, songs are only $1, but that adds up! Again my local library comes in handy when it comes to not just books, but taking out the latest CDs. Now if only my library card could get me free manicures...

Stop & Stare: WE ALL DO IT!

The following is a scenario that you most likely have witnessed as a driver, or a passenger.

Driver on highway: What is this traffic ahead! Ugh, you know what, I bet it’s some silly accident that everyyyyyyyyybody has to turnnnnnn their headddddddddd and watch as they drive by.

Driver approaches accident.


Driver (turning head and slowing down car): Oh wow, this traffic over this silly accident! This is what everyone slows down for...unbelievable!

YOU ARE AT FAULT TOO, DRIVERS!