Rant of the Week: We'reeee Backkkkk!

You heard me! So feel free to write suggestions about topics you want me to rant about and if I care enough to read the suggestions, I'll consider it! ;) So please leave comments below!

Top 3 of the Week: Why I Hate the Start of Fall

1) It Marks the End of Summer

For as long as we are in school, we are conditioned to believe that the summer represents freedom and independence from all responsibility. Lay out by the beach or pool, go on a yacht, have a barbecue--are all things we do to relax. So once the fall season arrives, it suddenly feels like the vacation of summer is over, and for those who actually go back to school, it is. Not to mention that it gets dark earlier, which is even MORE depressing!

2) What the Hell Do I Wear Everyday!

Ok so now the weather is getting cooler, it's hard to figure out what to wear when its still slightly warm during the day, yet chilly at night. So I'm forced to feel like I have menopause when I continue to put my light jacket off and on. But regardless, unless I forever layer up, I will not be prepared for the change of weather, and thus, like most people this time of year, succumb to catching a cold because of it!

3) The Return of Decent Television
Now this one has its pros and cons. While I love the return and premieres of new TV shows, I find myself TIVOing everything, and find myself stuck in front of a TV on my days off. While it is entertaining, I feel like a waste of life sitting on my coach for hours straight. What I do need to do is start eliminating the non-contenders, but that still leaves me with about 6 hours a week of TV! Not good when I'm trying to maintain some semblance of a social life!

Soccer: I Will Never Be A Fan!

If you read my blog, you might find yourselves nodding your head in agreement with most things, as the whole point of the blog is to find the humor we all deal with in our daily lives. But I can guarantee there is one opinion I have that certainly does not relate to the majority of folks, at least around the world.

I HATE soccer.

Mayeb I'm not alone in America, as we seem to be the only nation that choses football over futbol. But for most of the world, soccer is the sport of choice, and quite frankly, I just can't see why.

I played a ton of sports growing up, but never soccer.

I watch a good amount of sports on TV as a fan and for work, but never soccer.

I think David Beckham is dreamy, and yet, I still never watch soccer.

There's so much running around in the sport, and so little scoring, that it just doesn't appeal to me. And yes, I prefer the mundane viewing of a baseball game, knowing full well that America's pastime makes some feel like time is never passing.

So no matter how big of a game it is, I will never understand the allure of this sport!

Top 3 of the Week: New TV Shows to Watch This Season

1) Glee
FOX took a chance by trying to capture an audience in the spring when it pulled a non-traditional move by premiering just one episode in anticipation of the fall season. Well I'd say it worked. There is nothing traditional about Glee, a show that operates like a musical, featuring about 4 song and dance segments throughout an episode. While it may seem a little amateur in its content (I can already tell from the student who admitted he's gay that each episode will have a Full House-like life lesson), Glee is written well and makes you want to root for the little glee club that could.


2) Melrose Place
I feel like I'm back in 6th grade, watching 90210 before Melrose Place. But my loyalty has taken me back to this series, and after 2 episodes, I do see potential. (Except from Ashley Simpson, who probably should have taken acting lessons before she moved to Melrose Place.) But Katie Cassidy, who plays the new Heather Locklear, gives the show some zest and reminds me of the crazy and entertaining original primetime soap opera was years ago.



3) The Jay Leno Show
NBC is definitely taking a chance by bumping up its late night show to primetime, but I actually think it's a smart risk. Sure, the ratings will fluctuate nightly depending on alternate programming, but the majority of the country doesn't go to sleep after 12am. So when you're looking for laughs, look no further than Jay Leno at 10pm. Critics panned the show for being too similiar to his old show, but who cares! When nothing is on at 10pm on a night that I want to watch TV, I'll be sure to be watching Jay Leno.

Calculators: A Blessing & A Curse!

There was a time in my life, where I was able to do basic math.
7 x 6 = 42.
8 x 9 = 72.

Now, if I'm presented a problem, I immediately draw a blank, and grab the nearest calculator to verify that I'm correct. Luckily, a calculator can be found in a moments notice, as I'm either by my phone or computer the majority of the day. But the sad part isn't that technology is forever attached to my hip, the sad part is that something that should easily be done on my own is no longer possible.


Growing up, we were trained not to use calculators until roughly about 6th grade. Then all hell broke loose. I can't even go to a store and calculate what 25% off of an item is. "Ohh..there's a price check? That'll work," I say as I yet again allow technology to calculate it for me. How about figuring out what to tip a waiter? Well luckily our phone has that feature for us.

Thankfully, my job doesn't require quick mathematics on the spot, but I'm still ashamed that I can't do most basic math without the help of a calculator--which is been a blessing and a curse, all in one.

Top 3 of the Week: Things That Annoyed Me at the VMAs

1) Kanye West--Get Over Yourself

I never liked the guy and never will. Clearly, his intent was to get on the front of the Yahoo homepage, and get the whole country Tweeting about his unnecessary call up to the stage to proclaim that Taylor Swift did not deserve to win Best Female Video of the Year, Beyonce did (Beyonce later won Video of the Year, which may have explained her loss in the female category...not sure if MTV ever awards both to one singer/band). But Kanye, who loves drama, had NO business getting up on stage other than to just see his name in the press the next day.

2) Lady Gaga Took it Too Far

Talk about someone who craves attention, Lady Gaga's outfits Sunday night went above the call of making a fashion statement. No, no. No fashion was involved when she tried to obnoxiously steal the attention with her over-the-top, dramatic and quite frankly, unflattering outfits. I normally respect Gaga for having her own style, but her outfits last night were so inexcusably ostentatious that I actually lost respect for her.

3) What Have The Awards Become?

Between every extraordinary performance and outlandish behavior on TV, the Video Music Awards should just be called "Music," because no one watches the videos anymore thanks to MTV never showing them, and in turn, no one cares who wins the awards (except Kanye West, apparently). So we are left with the performances to be entertained with, and if last night was an indication of what the VMAs stand for, then they should just call it a damn concert.

Smart Move FOX!--Ellen, the New American Idol Judge

"You sounded a little pitchy."

"When you hit your falsetto is when you really shine."

"I believe you are a true artist."

When Ellen Degeneres says these comments as the new American Idol judge this season, are you really going to take her seriously? After all, judging musical talent as someone who has NO musical experience is going to be hard to take.

But knowing that the entertainment value and the laughs will only increase is why FOX made the wise move hiring Degeneres to replace the always-entertaining Paula Abdul.

Entering what feels like its 2nd decade of American Idol, it will undoubtedly need some intrigue to overshadow what will be a lesser tier of talent. (Seriously, what has Kris Allen done yet?)

So I fully support the decision to hire Degeneres. If you saw her as a guest judge on So You Think You Can Dance, you know how great she can be in the role of comic relief. And for those Paula Abdul fans like myself, it's a relief that her replacement is going to be someone of Ellen's caliber.

Even if it comes at the expense of ZERO credibility in the music industry, it's still the wise choice. C'mon, if Randy Jackson who has been in the business for all those years, can get away with just contributing "Yeah dawg! That was hot!" to the show, I think Ellen will be JUST fine.

Top 3 of the Week: Reasons Why It's OK to Be Cheap

1) Maybe You Just Don't Have the Money!
People are so quick to judge others who chose to shop at Target or Forever 21 for clothes, eat at McDonald's or not eat out at all, or buy just one drink or none at all when they go out. Because let's face it, living gets expensive. So your job pays a little or you don't even have a job to begin with right now, sometimes looking cheap is OK when it's all you can afford!



2) It's More Fun to Brag About How Much You Saved!
This category is for me, as I'm known to take pride is the savings I get when I purchase something on sale (Have you read my Bargain Shopping Post?) Sure, if you can afford to buy J Brand jeans for $200, more power to you. But even if you do have the money, isn't it more satisfying to know you can get the same-looking jeans for a quarter of the price if you shop smart?


3) It's the Principle!
I will continue to believe in this one. If someone gipped me out of $2 when something should have been on sale and didn't ring up, or if a waitress added an extra dollar to the total bill, they're going to hear from me. Sure its chump change in the end, but it's the principle of others trying to get one over us!

Everything is Art! I Don't Get It!

If you look at me, talk to me, hang with me, you know that I'm not an artsy person. I don't get art, and never will.

Yes, we all know art is subjective, but c'mon! Let's be honest. Everything can be "art!"

I could literally dump a bucket of paint on a mural, swish it around with my feet, and call it art.

I can take out a blank canvas, scribble lines all over the place, and call it art.

I could take a photo of a puddle of water, and, yes, CALL IT ART!

What's to say that we're all not "artists?" And if you think we all are artists in our own way, then you're too artsy for me.

I just don't get it. Sorry!

Why I Struggle WIth Transition!

Ok, ok...I know you've all been eager for a new post from The Brooke Schneider Show blog. So eager in fact, the fan mail is getting quite nasty. So here I am, back again, to continue the blog, and to be honest, I'm struggling to get into the swing of things.

The reason why, is because I just got back from vacation. Which means it's going to take some time for me to adjust back to the life I had before Strawberry Daiquiri's by the poolside and palm trees in sight. Now, I'm struggling to remember how I get to work, and what my routine coming home is. The truth is, I don't do well with transition.

Whether its moving to new places, or changing jobs or schools, or yes, coming back from a nice vacation, I never do well with the transition. I'm even worried how I'm going to handle Paula Abdul leaving American Idol this year! Mentally it just takes time for me to adjust, and after this vacation, I'm still yearning for the freedom of responsibility.

In fact, I don't even remember what I normally write my blogs about. What is this Top 3 of the Week nonsense? And "Rant of the Week?" Yeah, I need to get on that.

So here is your damn blog post. Maybe the next one I'll be a bit more used to the routine of posting!